Southern Backyard Essentials–A Beer Guided Tour

I was recently in a real Southern yard in a real Southern City –Muscella, GA.  Atlanta’s no longer a real Southern City–it’s just a city located in the South.  I was here when it was Southern.   There are common essential elements found in real Southern yards.  Here’s a beer guided pictorial of a pretty good one.

Before we get started, you’re going to need a beverage.  DUMP THAT SWEET TEA!! It’s too hot outside for that.  Instead, wrap your hands around Atlanta Brew Company’s Red Brick Summer Brew.  It’s a German style wheat…a “hefe weizen” to be precise.  (No idea what the hell that means.)  It’s got a nice subtle fruit and spice finish and a wedge of orange or lemon is the perfect garnish.  This one get’s my vote for June’s Front Porch Southern Sipper Award! (Cheers!  …and the crowd went crazy!)

Let’s get started, shall we?  Ladies first. Double click the pictures, then double click again for a larger image…the kind that only a thousand bucks worth of Nikon will get you.

First and foremost, you must have a sign to greet visitors.

Welcome neighbors!

Welcome neighbors!

And you better be able to back it up.

2.8 seconds...pretty fast!

2.8 seconds...pretty doggone fast!

Here’s a front yard essential.

Been there for years....no idea on earth how it got there.

Been there for years....no idea on earth how it got there.

Here’s another.

Big dish for my big screen.

Big 'ol dish for my big 'ol screen.

You’ll need a place for your tools.

Nice shed with a porch for beer drinking!

Nice shed with a porch for beer drinking!

Here’s the back of the shed.

Uhmmm?  Whassat?

Uhmmm? Whassat?

That’s a place for your….

Cluck, cluck, cluck!

Cluck, cluck, cluck!

You put this flag on the front porch.

Old Glory!

Old Glory!

You’ll likely find this one on the back porch. This is a home-made back-porch. You must double click this!

It's a Southern thing...not racist.

It's a Southern thing...not a racist thing.

Here’s a redneck Cadillac.

Almost too low to drive proudly.

Almost too low to drive proudly.

Don’t forget to put one of these on your dash.

Yeah baby!

Yeah baby!

Here’s what happens when you hit a cow with your redneck Cadillac.

Just leave it in the yard.

Just leave it in the yard.

You’re bound to find a few things that used to work.

Ex-three wheeler...is that a keg?  Whooeeee!

Ex-three wheeler...is that a keg? Whooeeee!

Some of them are projects.

Definitely gonna fix this one of these days...maybe...ah, just leave it there.

Definitely gonna fix this one of these days...maybe...ah, just leave it there.

Some are too far gone to fix.

Fix-a-flat ain't fixing this flat.

Fix-a-flat ain't fixing this flat.

And don’t forget the playground, ’cause somebody’s gonna bring some kids.

All the kids that lived in this house are grown.

All the kids that lived in this house are grown.


Real Southern yards are full of stuff.  A lot of it just blends into the scenery after a while and projects don’t get done because there’s just more important stuff to do…like barbecue with the family.

“Just leave it there for a while” is a way of life.  A good one at that.

Cheers!

Jim

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