Here’s the video. I dedicate it to our President on his quest to become King of the World. Listen to it as you read the rest of this post.

Current events are taking every beer in my refrigerator to deal with. Czars, Government Motors, Government Banking, Government Healthcare, Cash for Clunkers, Cash for Appliances, Wall Street bail-out to newspaper bail-outs. Gigantic fucking government is no longer creeping up…it’s tackled me. I can’t bank, can’t buy a car, can’t buy a house, can’t get medical care without the GD government having a hand in it.  Fellini’s pizza now requires me to fill out a form with all of my personal data before I can get a pizza to go.  Upside–there’s a Government wonk in the men’s room waiting to wash my hands after I take a piss.

Here’s the weirdest part. Forget the back-breaking debt King Obama’s programs are going to burden our children with….we need to worry about our country’s place in the world. “No International balance of power.” Are you fucking kidding me Mr. President? Balance of power is exactly what has kept World order since WWI. US is no longer a super-power….on and on and on and on. President Obama is positioning the world for a post-USA era. He is surrendering. Once China succeeds with Russia on displacing the dollar as the back-up world currency….we are done, and you better be holding onto your nuts when it happens.

Relax...I'm on it.....

King Obama has declined Prime Minister Brown’s request for a meeting five times during the Bananna Republic UN sessions this week. Note to the Prez: The UK is our closest ally on the planet. Do Not Ignore. WTF is going on? Can’t the shadow government handle a meeting with Brown? Putin must have a giant hard-on every time he watches King Obama make another move that diminishes our country’s place on this planet.

BFFs?

The bully-pulpit has reached my living room and I don’t like it. I do like this song. I listen to it as I cower in fear as I watch the next thing our President will do to dismantle our Country. I cannot wait until the next election…assuming we’ll still have free elections. I’ll work with ACORN to make sure I get to vote multiple times and get these assholes out of office before they do irreparable harm to the county my family members died for in the name of freedom.

Shirtless Rulers! Cool!! Duh?

I was rooting for Obama, but I have fallen out of love with him and his policies. Frankly, he is scaring me.

Cheers,

Jim

What does this mean? Anyone?

Cheers!

Jim

Hotness Obama!

…and a couple of unwanted side-effects, most notably the recent article in Newsroom Magazine that ranked the Top 25 Party Colleges and included recreational waterboarding at keggers as a judging criteria.

“We were friggin’ board with just getting drunk every night,” said Barry Frisko President of Sigma Aumygod fraternity, “all that vomit…it sucks.   Then we saw President Obamas memo on waterboarding and exactly how to do it so that you wouldn’t really die from it, you’d just be scared shitless and think you were going to die and you’d tell anybody anything…what a great twist for beer-truth-or-dare.   It’s hilarious!”

Step by step...nobody gets hurt for real!

On to other things…

Time to get Joe Biden a new hat! Better make it out of aluminum foil as he seems to give out classified information faster than waterboarded detainees.  Gotta have some kind of barriers to keep the Russians from figuring out everything he’s ever been told.  Just this week he divulged the exact location of the secret bunker where the VP himself would be taken in case of a National emergency.  Al Queda staff sent Joe a $100 gift basket from Edible Arrangements.  Wanna know some State Secrets…just ask.  Just ask Joe.  It’s really that simple.  The man has no filters.

Testing 1,2...Testing...Is this thing on? Ah, goody!

“The first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.”  This is how Joe described his running mate in 2007.  He definitely needs one of these.

Joe's new hat.

Then of course there’s Nancy Pelosi, now fighting for her political life against the CIA. That’s right, the CIA.  The same agency that can detect a fart in the shower from 500 miles away and tell you what you’ve had to eat over the last three days.  She only accused them of lying to the Congress of the United States about the latest college craze….no biggie…WTF???   Republicans smell blood.

Nancy's not nervous.

Nancy may be a liar, but she misses her sister.

Separated at birth??

To round things out, Harry Reid–incompetent arrogant traitor and genuine threat to our democracy as we know it, made some stupid gaffes of his own…not even worth the trouble of mentioning.

Harry saluting President Obama

Here’s the punch-line to all of this week’s news.  A new CNN poll…of all the places… shows that we’re starting to like…

Mr. Popular!

I’m exhausted.    This took me

Cheers,

Jim

Read this sign carefully

It’s always good to know that next time you need a flat tire, you’ve got a choice.  I called the number on the sign and asked the owner what he meant.  He hung up on me.

Here’s another great idea in case you need a faster way to get off of your roof.

That's a house. That's its' roof. Yes, that's a sliding board.

I knocked on the front door and met the owner of the house…Buddy.  He either couldn’t pronounce or didn’t want me to use his last name.  I asked him if he sold pool supplies.  (Logical explanation, right?)  “Naw” he said.  “Why do you have a sliding board on the roof?”  I asked.  “We like to get real drunk and use it for rasslin.’” (read: “wrestling”)

Click here for highly disturbing demonstration of roof rasslin’.  Warning:  strong language.

Ya’ll come back now, y’hear?

Cheers,

Jim

That’s what the sign said in front of a rural tree service, firewood and stump removal company that I passed today.  Made me think.  Made me proud that they had the balls to say that out loud.  Redneck, religious and proud.  Guys that work their asses off for a days wage.  They’re the backbone of this country that rights us when we begin to sway.

I saw some asshole today on FoxNews that is suing his child’s high-school because they’re having the graduation ceremony in a church.  He’s claiming discrimination…blah, blah, blah.  Get over it.  Let the kids graduate without all the drama.  It amazes me that this guy is using his child’s graduation as a political and religious debate platform.

Me?  I miss the Cleavers.  I miss patriotism.  I miss tolerance.  I miss what America used to be, but I can feel her about to roar back to life.  We’re going back to the basics and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop us. C’mon girl, C’mon America…let’s go.

God.  Family.  Country.

Agree with me or not, but there’s a little something somewhere in the back of the minds of even the most ardent disbelievers. Something that lingers.  Something that won’t quite go away.

I believe God lurks because he’s there.  Feel free to disagree.  I won’t hold it against you or push my beliefs down your throat.  It takes real courage to believe in something.

Have a voice.  Be an advocate.  Be for something instead of against something.  Have the courage to believe…in anything.

I needed for this post.

Cheers,

Jim